i hate my fucking body. im tired. im so tired. i hate the way i look in everything. i get to live this ONE life and I look the way I do?? i can’t be hot??? i can’t be talented??? i have to just be stuck with whatever— THIS is!? i have to be a woman and be told over and over and over again by the people making the LAWS that GOVERN US that im not valued that im being annoying that i don’t MATTER as much that I’m shrill and stupid and incapable of making my own decisions. we scream and weep and mourn and shriek and they sit there and laugh in our face, if we get a response at all. they make us beg just so they can strip us of any dignity. a 16 year old orphan in florida has to give birth as ordered by a judge because her parents aren’t alive to let her get an abortion. FUCK. fuck!!!! FUCK!!! if you perpetuate this even a little bit I hope you burn. i Hope you burn alive. there is no hell but GOD i wish one existed just for the pleasure of seeing u suffer half as much as what you’re doing to people. for encouraging this system. for leaving the world and the people who live in it to rot so 30 people or whatever can HOARD invisible money like theyre dragons on a mountain. FUCK!!!! I am so ANGRY!!!!!
if u don’t have big naturals i legiterally do not want 2 hear ur opinion on how lucky I am to have them. smaller women will send u mental telepathic daggers at every turn, men only like them for what they can do for them, and clothing manufacturers want u dead. name three high profile model it girls in the last 30 years who were anything above a B cup. quickly
Hello! 3 months ago you sent my your baby vibes my way, and I just wanted to update you that I got a positive pregnancy test today!!!! I've only told my husband and best friend at this point as it's still suuuper early, but I wanted to share it with you too! <3 We were just starting infertility testing so this is incredibly exciting!
– Anonymous
OMG congratulations!!!! ahhhhhhhh that’s so exciting i’m so happy for you!! i am wishing you so much luck, you have no idea. i hope everything goes safely and smoothly!! <333
last week i had a shitty journey home. it involved two missed flights and several hundred dollars in rental car fees. plus, it ended with a funeral. not exactly a fun destination.
it was my uncle, so only a semi personal loss. rather, ive been dealing with seeing my dad lose a brother, with seeing my grandma lose a son, with seeing my favorite aunt lose her husband. and most of all, for the first time in my life, and probably because it’s my first death as an adult, i am flinchingly and wholeheartedly terrified of death. im grieving the future loss of my own life more than im grieving his.
i have been unable to think of anything else this last week. i can’t move past the idea that when we die- there will be nothing. we don’t go anywhere. we simply return to what we were before we were born. a spectacular blankness, a total nothing. save your afterlife and religion, please. it’s not for me. i am really struggling. everything feels entirely small and pointless. hopefully it’s a long way away, but every passing breath feels like a countdown. and i can’t breathe or function or think because of it. for the first time, i feel like i have to count the number of times i get to lay on my boyfriend‘s chest or feel the sun on my arms or take a sip of coffee or open a new package. im already grieving the times when I can’t and I don’t know how to stop. I feel very reckless because of it. suddenly every fear feels so meaningless, but every joy feels so fleeting. we’re all hurtling towards the end. nothing is comforting. maybe i just need therapy.
how do u pretend that anything else in ur country matters when 10 year olds forced to birth their father’s children are the stakes. or the wannabe new mother on the verge of bleeding out. or the twenty something assaulted on her way home. or the person who would k*ll themselves rather than grow something inside them. how do u talk or watch or think or care about anything else. how. how can u. how is it not always on ur mind.
Thanks for sending your baby vibes my way haha, I'll try to remember to keep you updated!
A little tip for your pregnancy scare which helps me keep myself from getting carried away with thinking I might be pregnant - if your hCG levels are high enough to give you pregnancy related symptoms, they'll be high enough to register on a pregnancy test. Usually any symptoms are either psychosomatic, or pretty normal occurrences day-to-day. Plus many people get similar symptoms in the lead up to their periods!
Hope you're hanging in there!
– Anonymous
this helped an unimaginable amount!!! thank you so much!! i cant believe nobody told me that?? (am I actually shocked? no, but ykwim)
also!!!!! im not pregnant!!!!!!!! i am SO. RELIEVED. still heartbroken over all this roe v wade stuff. but I feel like I can breathe again after two weeks. thank you for your kind words💖💖 i hope you are successful soon!!!!!
